Life More Abundantly
Gather 'Round
*****This is a duplicate post. The blog has moved to
http://lifemoreabundant.wordpress.com After December 24, 2007, there will be no duplicate posting at this site. Thank you.**********
Most of the men and boys from our church are gathered right now under some oak trees. They're not experimenting with druidism, they're admiring the eight point buck that one of our teenage boys shot. It's his first deer, and to date, no one else has shot anything bigger this season. They have gathered to celebrate with him, encourage him and let him tell his story.
It's sad that our western culture has largely stripped our young men of this rite of passage. I don't necessarily mean the hunting, I mean the gathering. We have no moments when young men can gather with older men to celebrate a specific achievement and tell their story. We have no quests for manhood; no odysseys or challenges to be answered and then celebrated. Our boys remain boys because they have never been called to be men.
I can hear the objections now: "Are you saying that to prove his manhood, he must kill something?" or "Are you saying that because I've never shot an animal, I'm not a man?" Of course I'm not saying either of these things. I am saying that he set out on a quest to learn a skill that will make him a better provider for and defender of his family, and he achieved that quest. What quests are we as a culture setting before our young boys? What opportunities do we give them to be surrounded by the other men of their "tribe" and ushered out of boyhood, into manhood? In our segregated culture, how many of our boys even know men who aren't their generational peers?
I don't think this particular young man is miraculously changed by shooting an eight point whitetail. I do think that what is helping him to develop into a man, instead of a grown-up boy is that he has men in his life who are willing to stop their own hunts and drive over to his land, and gather around a dead deer to celebrate his achievement. I think he's going to walk a little taller tomorrow. I know he's going to feel the right to discuss hunting with the men as a man, not as a boy. I know he will remember this day, and these faces, for the rest of his life.
Congratulations Jordan. We're proud of you.
In My Head
*****This is a duplicate post. The blog has moved to
http://lifemoreabundant.wordpress.com After December 24, 2007, there will be no duplicate posting at this site. Thank you.**********
I just recently accidentally stumbled across "Facebook." A friend asked if I was on facebook because that's where all of her baby pictures were. So, drawn by the promise of baby pictures, I became ensnared by the addiction that is facebook.
She did not lie. Her baby pictures were worth the look, and the added bonus was that I reconnected with several people with whom I had lost touch over the years. As I began to browse through the profiles and pictures, I came across several hundred pictures from my years at college. I wasn't in many of them, but to look back over the pictures, (realizing that someone scanned all of these pictures!) and reminisce was fun. What was more fun was the comments other people had posted. Under one picture, Nathan, a guy I have known all of my conscious life, posted "The me in my memory is cooler than the haircut in that picture."
I laughed out loud.
Aren't we all different in our heads? Don't we all look back on pictures and realize that time really evens out perception? I was in a teen pageant at 15, and thought at the time that I was the most beautiful that night than I had ever, or would ever be. I look back at the pictures and think: "Really? Teal satin? And what were we doing with the bangs?"
I remember thinking (with all the logic, and awareness a 15 year old can possess) that I would keep that pageant dress forever, and wear it again "the first time I get to go to the Oscars." I honestly remember thinking it, and rehearsing how I would tell Joan Rivers on the red carpet how I had worn it in a pageant at 15.
On the other hand, there's this picture of me at my sister's wedding, when I remember feeling fat and frumpy. See how I'm cleverly hiding my "fat stomach" with my hand? I look at it now and think "Dang, what was I complaining about?" By the way. That little boy beside me is Jonathan, my husband. Doesn't he look 16?
As I laugh, and say that the girl in my memory is cooler than the glasses in that picture, these pictures are a reminder of how embarrassingly long it took me to stop thinking like a 15 year old. That maid of honor at my sister's wedding was still hoping she'd end up at the Oscars one day - for screen writing, and not in the teal satin. I don't remember when I stopped looking forward to when my life would "really begin," but it's not that long ago. I spent too many of my years thinking that real life was something other than the moments I was living. I wasted a lot of real life living in a fantasy.
So yeah, the girl in my memory is a lot different from the girl in these pictures. I'm a lot more comfortable in my own skin, my own clothing, and my own life. I'm glad to be the woman I am now, instead of the girl in both my memory, and these pictures.
Calling All Mamas
*****This is a duplicate post. The blog has moved to
http://lifemoreabundant.wordpress.com After December 24, 2007, there will be no duplicate posting at this site. Thank you.**********
Back in October, I blogged a little about my discomfort at the immunization process during ms. mac’s two month “well baby” check-up. I didn’t include a lot of the details, because until I began comparing notes, I didn’t realize that my experience was atypical. But now I need some advice from y’all who’ve been there.
When I took mac in for her appointment I was handed a single sheet of paper with a title like “What to expect at today’s appointment.” or something similar. It included this line: “Your child may or may not be receiving shots today.” among other similarly unhelpful sentences.
After the doctor gave the physical exam, she tossed over her shoulder, as she was walking out the door, “Any questions about the shots today? The nurses will be giving them in a moment.”
I said, “Yes. What shots are you giving her? When is the chicken pox shot . . .” and at that she cut me off and shut the door. 20 minutes later, and my daughter’s getting hungry, the nurses arrived with 5 shots and an oral vaccine. While one was giving the oral vaccine, the other was saying, “Okay Mom, hold her hands. Get ready.” and they plunged 5 needles into her thighs.
She’s howling, and they thrust a stylus into my hand and tell me to sign the box on the computer screen before I can pick up my daughter. It is a blank screen with a box in the middle of it - like a credit card machine at Target. I sign and I’m told “Give her some children’s Tylenol.” as they leave me with a distraught baby.
After talking with my friends who have children, and then Ms. Pat, over Thanksgiving - who is a nurse in a pediatric office - I came to realize that I was not unreasonable for expecting better treatment than I received. For two months I’ve been giving them the benefit of the doubt. It’s a big practice. They had a doctor out on maternity leave. I thought that surely when I brought to their attention that I had received no documentation regarding the shots they would apologize for their oversight.
Today I called. Little mac has a four month appointment in 2 weeks, and I asked if I could get a copy of the information regarding what she has already received, and what she will be receiving. I was told no. They told me that if I didn’t ask for the information at her last appointment there wasn’t anything they could do, and they wouldn’t fax me anything in advance of her appointment. After some questioning, they said the best they could do was send over an immunization record. When I asked about possible side affects, they were unconcerned and told me I could ask for that when I arrived for the appointment on the 13th.
My gut reaction is to fire my pediatric practice and find a new one - what do you think? Am I being unreasonable? Shouldn’t the informational sheets regarding vaccines be so commonplace in an office that they could lay their hands on one in a heartbeat? I wasn’t asking for it that second. I just wanted to see it before she had the shots. I wanted to know what to look for when I bring her home. I want to be informed about my daughter’s health care, not left standing on the sidelines!
This isn’t rhetorical. What do you think? Am I being unreasonable? What would you do?
My Cup Overflows
*****This is a duplicate post. The blog has moved to
http://lifemoreabundant.wordpress.com After December 24, 2007, there will be no duplicate posting at this site. Thank you.**********
Monday morning, a parade of boxes came into my classroom, carried by our math teacher and her three children and a cousin. The boxes contained little girls clothes, sized 9 months through 24 months! Boxes of them, all for the little mac. Over the Thanksgiving break, this family was visiting with other members of their family who have a little girl 2 years older than ours. This family mentioned to my friends that they didn’t know a single family with a little girl to whom they could pass down their clothes. Our friend said, “I do!” Her cousins asked, “Would they be offended to get hand-me downs?”
Offended? Not us! Blessed at the providence of God who would continue to provide clothing to our little girl? Absolutely!
Moving Day
Well, I have outgrown what Blogger can do. So I am moving the blog to Wordpress.
The new address is:
http://lifemoreabundant.wordpress.com/ I will be posting duplicate posts here until Christmas, after which this site will no longer be updated.
All of the posts (and comments) from here have already been moved over there. So change your blogrolls and bookmarks if you have 'em. Thanks.
Labels: writing words
Wordless Wednesday: Freedom From Binding Clothing
She's just hanging out at school right now, waiting for her clothes to come out of the washing machine. It was "body fluid" day. Trust me, that's all you want to know.
Labels: baby cuteness, wordless wednesday
School Mascot
Our students are actively interested in all aspects of little mac's life. They often ask questions, and a couple of them are worth sharing:
The first one I filed under "awkward." As Jonathan was thawing the frozen milk for mac's bottle, one of our tenth grade boys asked me if we fed her whole, or 2% milk. I paused for a moment, and then just said "human milk." Fortunately he figured it out, and didn't ask anymore. Unfortunately, the first answer that came to my brain is what Terri's youngest daughter called it: "Booby milk." I'm glad that didn't slip out of my mouth.
The second one happened last Monday. We carry one of the boys to his after school job every Monday afternoon, and he was getting into the front seat as Jonathan was snapping mac's "bucket" into the base. She had been smacking her gums all day (the beginning of teething, we realized later) and Jonathan remarked "She's going to town on that gum!" The student leaned over to me, and asked, "You let mac have gum?"
I've also mentioned before that they have insisted we name our next child a name beginning with a P so we would have a mac and a PC. Well, they figured out that her fetal name was Pomegranate, so WAS mac and PC. Now, when she's happy and talking they call her mac. When she's cranky or crying, they say "Now she's being a PC."
Labels: baby cuteness, school
A Little Surreal
I've just realized that there are people I have never spoken to or communicated with in any way who are reading my blog. It's a little surreal to meet someone for the first time, and they already know all about my life and my daughter, and I can't even remember their name.
Labels: general life, writing words
You Tell Me, Is This Legal?
Here we are on our first day of babywearing at school two weeks ago. You can see she's pretty low, and she's crooked. She's secure, but I wasn't tying it tight enough so she was sagging.
Here we are today. This is what the wrap looked like at Sam's Club. I'm getting much better at tying - both tight enough, and much quicker. She fell asleep only minutes after the picture was taken.
My next goal is to master some other ties - specifically a hip carry for when she's more alert and wants to look around. When she's sitting up on her own I'd also like to learn a back carry.
Labels: babywearing
Rain After Drought
Are there any among the false gods of the nations that can bring rain?
Or can the heavens give showers?
Are you not he, O LORD our God?
We set our hope on you,
for you do all these things.
Jeremiah 14:22Labels: thankfulness
Family Followup
Well, my family supports me in the baby wearing thing. Here are two e-mails I received. The first is from a cousin who spends her winters (!!!!!!) in the Arctic as a nurse. The second is from my Aunt, who lives in Darwin Australia. (I have a diverse family geography.)
I got quite a chuckle out of your account of the 2 busy-bodies in the grocery store. I would say they quite obviousy never raised kids. The bit about self-righteously wondering if it was legal was really sad if it wasn't so hilarious.They also haven't travelled very much nor learned very much about other cultures.
They should see how the Inuit carry their babies, buck naked except for a diaper, in amoutiks (glorified huge parka hoods). When they are tiny, they are curled up, when they grow, their feet come around to each side and they 'ride piggy-back'. This can go on until they are 3 years old or more.
In the western arctic, they do the same idea with an oversized flannel shirt tied at the waist and then a huge parka over the whole thing. When I first saw this, I was sure the baby would suffocate, but they come out just as warm and toasty and happy as can be.
The Gwich'in up near Inuvik have a wide embroidered belt that is slung over the shoulder on one side and draped down to the hip on the other. The baby lays along the hip secured by the belt.
Women in Africa have the kids sometimes on their backs, sometimes on their hips, and sometimes on their front, in a wrap like you have. I have also seen babies carried that way in Mexico. You probably know all this already, but it just goes to show that some people just don't get alternate ways of doing things. Happily go about doing what works for you.
Just read your blog about the couple following you around wondering if your baby wrap was legal or not. Honestly, unless the poor kid was hanging upside-down, which I presume she wasn't (!!), then what business was it of their anyway. Even if she was hanging upside-down, it wasn't their business. How about sending us a picture of you and [little mac] using the 'illegal' wrap/carrier.
So there you go - and to answer Aunty Lily: no, she wasn't hanging upside down (although she does quite like that position from time to time), and I'm working on some pictures. They will be coming soon. Thanks for the support.
Labels: babywearing, family
"Praising God is one of the highest and purest acts of religion. In prayer we act like men, but in praise we act like angels." Puritan Thomas Watson
